someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
