Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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