It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Randomize
