she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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