my mouth tastes like poor choices
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
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