I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
If its not for food we ain't going out.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
