The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
