i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I just want to make out with him forever
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize