Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
