Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
