I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize