Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Randomize
