at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
