So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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