it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
