I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
