your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Apparently you make a good broom.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
