i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
