I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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