so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
