the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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