is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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