I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
