apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize