i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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