Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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