I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
