Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
