Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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