Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
