i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
