i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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