She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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