So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Can I color on your dick again?
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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