Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
