No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize