Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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