all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
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