I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
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We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
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I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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