Jerry, you need to find god
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Randomize
