How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize