he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
