He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
