And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
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