sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Swine flu. Run for my life!
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
