I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
The ass gains better be worth it
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