I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
