and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize