Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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