Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Randomize