Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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